chimesblog

So here I am on a normal hermiting Saturday afternoon. Elbow deep in crafting. Getting ready to put it all away and go work out.

I’ve been making shrink jewelry all day and I went outside to spray acrylic coating on the pieces to seal them.  For all who don’t know, I have a huge porch that’s enclosed with 8-10 ft. walls.  I chose this apartment for that reason because I was concerned about my safety living alone (I used to get stalkers — but that’s a really long and scary story).

ANYWHO, who would have thought that I would get stuck outside on the hottest day of the year?  Go figure.

The big sliding door’s lock latched apparently when I shut it. Normally I would have just kept the screen door open, but I was spraying fume-y stuff and — oh — by the way — my screen door has been broken since I moved in. So that wasn’t an option anyway.

I finished spraying. Turned around. Pulled on the door. What the HELL?  Locked.

Poop.

Okay, wellll I seem to remember one of my windows not wanting to shut all the way (which I noticed earlier today because it annoyed me that I was running the air with the window cracked).  So, Ms. MacGuyver took the grill cleaning utensil brush and pried the window open a bit more.  But then the window slammed all the way shut when I took out the utensil to put a tree branch in it to hold it open to pull with my body weight.

CRAP.

So, what is my next option?  Well, just in case, I try the door again. Not so much.

So I have this little tree in my porch that I have always been afraid that some robber/stalker/burglar/rapist was going to climb down and get me (yea, paranoid much??). Well, thank GOD for the tree because that’s what saved me.

There isn’t any branches low enough to where I could climb up from the bottom of the tree, so I grabbed my bike that was parked on my porch and used that to boost me high enough to where I could start climbing.  All the while, all I could think about was OH MY GOD I’M IN MY PJS AND IT’S 3 PM AND I’M GROSS I HOPE NOBODY SEES ME CLIMBING THIS TREE!!!

So I get high enough to where I can see over the walls.  At this point I’m trying to figure out how to get over the wall and grab onto the light pole (which was how I suspected burglars/rapists/robbers/stalkers could get to the tree) and slide down.  I was looking around a bit for more options and I noticed a guy in the parking lot walking towards my door (my apartment is next to the entrance).

AND, not to mention, this guy is the ONE neighbor I ever talked to here and he’s saved my ass once before already (not as dire last time — couldn’t get the door open because the lock on the door was broken (yay).

Okay, so here I am. In the tree. In my jammies.  Hollering out this kid’s name.

He sees me. HALLELUJAH.  ”So… this might look a little weird, but my sliding door locked and I’m stuck out here. Can you call the property management?”

SURE!

Yes.  Most random, awesome thing ever.

This kid is my hero.  I’m seriously bringing him cookies later. He tossed me water over the wall and everything.

So I sat and waited about a half hour for the maintenance guy to let me in my apartment (ridiculous) — and yes, the kid I knew could have let me in himself had my door to the apartment not been locked.

Anyway, that was pretty intense. It is ridiculously hot out (heat index of 106°) and if I hadn’t caught my neighbor, I’d probably still be sitting out there or have 2 broken legs from climbing over a wall and jumping down.

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